Jess:
Wait—seriously? That was my pizza.

Mia (mouth full):
It’s been in there for like three days.

Jess:
And it still wasn’t yours.

Mia:
You didn’t even label it. I thought you didn’t want it.

Jess:
That’s not how this works, Mia. You can’t just assume food is abandoned because it’s been in there for 72 hours.

Mia (shrugs):
Okay, well maybe if you ever cleaned out your stuff, I wouldn’t have to guess.

Jess:
Oh, we’re talking about cleaning now? Should I bring up the science experiment growing in your Tupperware on the bottom shelf?

Mia:
That’s rich, coming from the person who leaves dishes “to soak” for a week.

Jess:
Because I work two jobs! I’m not lounging around binge-watching reality shows all day.

Mia (defensive):
Wow. So now I’m lazy?

Jess:
I didn’t say that—
(beat)
Okay maybe I implied it.

Mia:
You know what? Next time, I’m putting a lock on my shelf. And don’t even think about touching my oat milk again.

Jess:
Then keep your oat milk off my shelf and we’re good.

[They both huff and walk away in opposite directions. Then a beat of silence.]

Mia (from the hallway):
…It was really good pizza though.

Jess (shouting back):
I know! That’s why I was saving it!

By bessi

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