Sandra:
Oh my God… look at that hair! What was I thinking? Was humidity my stylist?

Host (laughing):
You were hilarious though! This scene had the whole crew dying.

Sandra (pointing at the screen):
Okay, but pause—pause! Did you see that fall? That was accidental and still Oscar-worthy. I don’t care what anyone says…

(leans back dramatically)
…I am the funniest person alive.

Host (laughing):
You’re not even being ironic right now.

Sandra (grinning):
Not even a little. Like, why don’t I have my own comedy shrine somewhere? Someone build me a statue mid-eyeroll.

Host:
We’ll get the blueprints ready. “Sandra Bullock: Queen of Chaos and Comedy.”

Sandra:
Put that on my gravestone.

By bessi

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